What is the deal with the overuse of LOL on chat rooms, comments, forum boards and other places unfunny people gather to laugh out loud at themselves?
I consistently see moronic posts with that annoying abbreviation. Things like, "Oh, I just stepped out to feed the dog and missed out, LOL" or "I just made a cup of coffee and it tastes bad, LOL". What the Hell is so funny about that? Would you REALLY laugh out loud at that? Or is it some nervous verbal filler you feel you have to end your sentences with. Like those annoying guys who think they can be funny overusing ellipses in a blog post...............
But really, shouldn't we behave online as we do within human interaction? Shouldn't we use actual words rather than "wnt 2 c the dr." or "R u goin 2mrrw?" or some other ilk? Why can't you walk on the same side of the sidewalk as the road that you drive on?
The Internet has made people lazy, misspelling misanthropes who feel the need to laugh out loud at their run of the mill life observations. That is, when they're not asking you to "send them the link" rather than taking five seconds and using Google. The overuse of LOL and other chat crutches makes me want to go find that fat kid from high school. You know, the one that always started a joke with, "Oh, you gotta hear this, it's SO FUNNY!!", and it wasn't.
Telling someone something is funny before it's proven is just bad comedic form. That shit will get you killed at a real comedy club. Well, at the very least, called a hack and heckled out the front door never to return again. Then again, beat up and locked in the trunk of a car would be a better lesson in how not to pull that "OMG, this story is FUN-NEE" line ever again.
He wasn't funny and neither are you. He just got fatter and lazier, and puts LOL in front of everything. He probably just asked his wife for sex and she held up a sign with "LOL" on it. Now, that shit IS funny. But then again, she married him - she must have a sense of humor in the first place.
Wednesday 15 February 2012
Tuesday 14 February 2012
A Love Letter To KTLA
It's Valentine's Day, and therefore the best day for an ode to my fave morning news program.
With me watching on the East Coast of Canada, KTLA is just getting going when most people are gone to work. You gotta love the fact that they're on the air reading news at 4AM Los Angeles time. That equates to 8AM my time, and I'll tell ya, it's a lot more entertaining than the other choices.
I'm always amazed at how the Ladies of KTLA are so casual compared to even the local news females. The local girls are so boring and stiff - even the national ones from CBC/CTV/Global are trying too hard. Then you've got the likes of Megan Henderson and Jessica Holmes on KTLA - you would think they'd be so stiff and serious but they're the complete opposite. Heck, Holmes has this gangly/goofy thing that she does sometimes that makes her just about the hottest, sweetest thing in the world.
Just give me a moment to catch my breath.
And Megan Henderson seems constantly amused at the whole situation, yet, like Holmes, she can be casual or professional as the situation call for. Unfortunately for them, yet fortunate for the viewer, the weather guys try and trip them up consistently. Somebody should give Mark Kriski his own show already.
I would be remiss if I didn't mention Sam Rubin. This guy is one of the few who can self-deprecate in one breath while being complementary in the next. He both reports and comments on the news at the same time. A very tough thing to pull off but Rubin consistently gives the goods.
I don't know what the Hell they'e doing on the Today show these days, but it's really fake and boring. Go on over to CBS and the best they could do was dig up Charlie Rose and Oprah's friend Gayle. Charlie's a great cure for insomnia and Gayle doesn't interview so much as act like an enamored fan. Blech.
And the Canadian national shows are stiff and boring as well. Even Breakfast Television, which used to be "hip" tv is some yammery chick and some fat guy with a suspenders fetish.
Nope, give me my KTLA - where the palm trees sway in February as the snow falls outside my window. Where producers do funny dances and the camera follows them. Where technicians will screw up your weather shot as payback for that remark Henry DiCarlo made about them. Sometimes the whole thing looks like some crazy community cable channel that was allowed to run amok. Sometimes you just gotta giggle and commend them for putting on television at 4 in the morning.
And have I mentioned Jessica Holmes? (Umm...yeah.....you did already) Well, dammit, I'm not finished. As I said before, she's got this goofy/gangly thing going on that was hilarious a few years ago when she did some segments from New York with Martha Stewart. Holmes screwed up during some demo with Martha, causing the passive aggressive remark "oh dear" from Martha Stewat.
It was some great television - I don't know if there's any video around, try and find some if you can. I immediately thought that Holmes could pull off the goofy girl schtick that Allie MacKay currently does. Then again, it would have to be a little more sharp/sitcom-like stuff, rather than the slightly grating/repetitive loop that MacKay finds herself in some days.
Bottom line, I'm a big fan. I have whiled away many non-work day mornings with the KTLA gang, and I hope they continue to burn as hot as that California sun.
With me watching on the East Coast of Canada, KTLA is just getting going when most people are gone to work. You gotta love the fact that they're on the air reading news at 4AM Los Angeles time. That equates to 8AM my time, and I'll tell ya, it's a lot more entertaining than the other choices.
I'm always amazed at how the Ladies of KTLA are so casual compared to even the local news females. The local girls are so boring and stiff - even the national ones from CBC/CTV/Global are trying too hard. Then you've got the likes of Megan Henderson and Jessica Holmes on KTLA - you would think they'd be so stiff and serious but they're the complete opposite. Heck, Holmes has this gangly/goofy thing that she does sometimes that makes her just about the hottest, sweetest thing in the world.
Just give me a moment to catch my breath.
And Megan Henderson seems constantly amused at the whole situation, yet, like Holmes, she can be casual or professional as the situation call for. Unfortunately for them, yet fortunate for the viewer, the weather guys try and trip them up consistently. Somebody should give Mark Kriski his own show already.
I would be remiss if I didn't mention Sam Rubin. This guy is one of the few who can self-deprecate in one breath while being complementary in the next. He both reports and comments on the news at the same time. A very tough thing to pull off but Rubin consistently gives the goods.
I don't know what the Hell they'e doing on the Today show these days, but it's really fake and boring. Go on over to CBS and the best they could do was dig up Charlie Rose and Oprah's friend Gayle. Charlie's a great cure for insomnia and Gayle doesn't interview so much as act like an enamored fan. Blech.
And the Canadian national shows are stiff and boring as well. Even Breakfast Television, which used to be "hip" tv is some yammery chick and some fat guy with a suspenders fetish.
Nope, give me my KTLA - where the palm trees sway in February as the snow falls outside my window. Where producers do funny dances and the camera follows them. Where technicians will screw up your weather shot as payback for that remark Henry DiCarlo made about them. Sometimes the whole thing looks like some crazy community cable channel that was allowed to run amok. Sometimes you just gotta giggle and commend them for putting on television at 4 in the morning.
And have I mentioned Jessica Holmes? (Umm...yeah.....you did already) Well, dammit, I'm not finished. As I said before, she's got this goofy/gangly thing going on that was hilarious a few years ago when she did some segments from New York with Martha Stewart. Holmes screwed up during some demo with Martha, causing the passive aggressive remark "oh dear" from Martha Stewat.
It was some great television - I don't know if there's any video around, try and find some if you can. I immediately thought that Holmes could pull off the goofy girl schtick that Allie MacKay currently does. Then again, it would have to be a little more sharp/sitcom-like stuff, rather than the slightly grating/repetitive loop that MacKay finds herself in some days.
Bottom line, I'm a big fan. I have whiled away many non-work day mornings with the KTLA gang, and I hope they continue to burn as hot as that California sun.
Sunday 12 February 2012
Guilty Pleasure Forever(In Time)
Rest In Peace Whitney Houston.
It's unfortunate, but she joins a long list of entertainers gone too soon. Her passing also has me thinking back to the time period where she was at her peak.
Almost the end of November, 1992, Houston's film The Bodyguard is released. I go see it with my girlfriend at the time, and find it surprisingly watchable. A film WITH music rather than a musical. Sure, the Costner stuff is over the top / Swayze in Roadhouse type cheese, but damn if it doesn't work.
Lawrence Kasdan's last big directorial hit, which looked at first glance like a movie he was slumming in. I mean, this is the guy who wrote The Big Chill, Empire Strikes Back, Body Heat, etc. for God's sake! And Costner was at his height after Dances With Wolves. It shouldn't have worked, but it did. Something for the men, something for the ladies, action, music, romance, and the African American audience appeal as well. The thing was a hit to the tune of over 400 million dollars. Awesome box office today, let alone almost twenty years ago.
The soundtrack was a smash. I'm sure Dolly Parton loved the royalties off her previous country hit. And it was everybody's last hurrah for a while. Kasdan and Costner haven't seen numbers like that since. Houston had some nice turns after, but this thing was the top for a while. I don't know if a sequel was ever mentioned down the road with the same cast, but even half the box office of the original would have worked.
Basically, The Bodyguard SHOULDN'T have worked, but it did. Certainly a guilty pleasure flick, but guilty pleasure is better than no pleasure at all. I can't put my finger on something since with the same jumble of elements - but it certainly has broad appeal. It's certainly watchable almost twenty years later. And the soundtrack is certainly not dated either.
Sure Houston had her demons, don't we all. But at least there's something captured that's still relevant years later, and years to come. Swayze's Roadhouse comes on every once in a while, and I catch myself watching each time. Legends of the Fall is another one of those stay-on-the-sofa-till-it's-over cable flicks
I'll be damned if The Bodyguard doesn't start showing up and joining the rest in Guilty Pleasure Heaven.
It's unfortunate, but she joins a long list of entertainers gone too soon. Her passing also has me thinking back to the time period where she was at her peak.
Almost the end of November, 1992, Houston's film The Bodyguard is released. I go see it with my girlfriend at the time, and find it surprisingly watchable. A film WITH music rather than a musical. Sure, the Costner stuff is over the top / Swayze in Roadhouse type cheese, but damn if it doesn't work.
Lawrence Kasdan's last big directorial hit, which looked at first glance like a movie he was slumming in. I mean, this is the guy who wrote The Big Chill, Empire Strikes Back, Body Heat, etc. for God's sake! And Costner was at his height after Dances With Wolves. It shouldn't have worked, but it did. Something for the men, something for the ladies, action, music, romance, and the African American audience appeal as well. The thing was a hit to the tune of over 400 million dollars. Awesome box office today, let alone almost twenty years ago.
The soundtrack was a smash. I'm sure Dolly Parton loved the royalties off her previous country hit. And it was everybody's last hurrah for a while. Kasdan and Costner haven't seen numbers like that since. Houston had some nice turns after, but this thing was the top for a while. I don't know if a sequel was ever mentioned down the road with the same cast, but even half the box office of the original would have worked.
Basically, The Bodyguard SHOULDN'T have worked, but it did. Certainly a guilty pleasure flick, but guilty pleasure is better than no pleasure at all. I can't put my finger on something since with the same jumble of elements - but it certainly has broad appeal. It's certainly watchable almost twenty years later. And the soundtrack is certainly not dated either.
Sure Houston had her demons, don't we all. But at least there's something captured that's still relevant years later, and years to come. Swayze's Roadhouse comes on every once in a while, and I catch myself watching each time. Legends of the Fall is another one of those stay-on-the-sofa-till-it's-over cable flicks
I'll be damned if The Bodyguard doesn't start showing up and joining the rest in Guilty Pleasure Heaven.
Friday 10 February 2012
What Makes A Song A (Potential) Classic?
Well, first of all, it's gotta be hauntingly sentimental, yet structurally sound. I think one song that kills on a structure basis is Bryan Adams' Run To You. I just love that guitar riff/bridge before the big finish at the end. Awesome transition.
It sometimes helps if the video was awesome. Run To You did have an awesome 80's video which adds to the memories. But Don Henley's Boys Of Summer has perhaps the best video bookend to an awesome song - I don't know of any other song/video matched so perfectly.
Timeless is good, but being open to other interpretations helps as well. There have been remix/dance/punk versions of Henley's tune that have worked really well. And someone redid Adams' tune on a slower scale which was happenin' as well. Then there are some current songs on the pop playlist today that someone throws a dance track behind them and calls it a dance song. Instead, it just makes the low points of the song more obvious.
I mention this topic today, because of a recent song I've seen that could potentially be one for the memories. And before you roll your eyes, take a look at the facts.
Katy Perry's The One That Got Away is notable for the fact that the video is an actual attempt to tell a story - something lacking in modern music videos. Heck, I remember the old days of music video shows when the video was integral to marketing the song - you HAD to have a great video. Alas, with the iTunes and iPods, the video seems to be lacking. Perry took the time to do something special with this song.
Here's the Youtube link to the official video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ahha3Cqe_fk&ob=av2e
I'm embarrassed to admit that I've had this song stuck in my head one time this past month. It is ridiculously poppy and syrupy, yet Perry is so darn earnest that the tone changes with the structure of the song. And before you dismiss it as a non-starter, be aware that she did a country version on the UK X-Factor show back in October 2011. I don't know if this is an official release, but damn if it doesn't work really well on its own for a different type of listener. The Youtube link is here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdMWB2O7lSI
Really interesting stuff. Can it be a classic, or is it just a flash in the pan. I guess only time will tell.
It sometimes helps if the video was awesome. Run To You did have an awesome 80's video which adds to the memories. But Don Henley's Boys Of Summer has perhaps the best video bookend to an awesome song - I don't know of any other song/video matched so perfectly.
Timeless is good, but being open to other interpretations helps as well. There have been remix/dance/punk versions of Henley's tune that have worked really well. And someone redid Adams' tune on a slower scale which was happenin' as well. Then there are some current songs on the pop playlist today that someone throws a dance track behind them and calls it a dance song. Instead, it just makes the low points of the song more obvious.
I mention this topic today, because of a recent song I've seen that could potentially be one for the memories. And before you roll your eyes, take a look at the facts.
Katy Perry's The One That Got Away is notable for the fact that the video is an actual attempt to tell a story - something lacking in modern music videos. Heck, I remember the old days of music video shows when the video was integral to marketing the song - you HAD to have a great video. Alas, with the iTunes and iPods, the video seems to be lacking. Perry took the time to do something special with this song.
Here's the Youtube link to the official video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ahha3Cqe_fk&ob=av2e
I'm embarrassed to admit that I've had this song stuck in my head one time this past month. It is ridiculously poppy and syrupy, yet Perry is so darn earnest that the tone changes with the structure of the song. And before you dismiss it as a non-starter, be aware that she did a country version on the UK X-Factor show back in October 2011. I don't know if this is an official release, but damn if it doesn't work really well on its own for a different type of listener. The Youtube link is here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdMWB2O7lSI
Really interesting stuff. Can it be a classic, or is it just a flash in the pan. I guess only time will tell.
Wednesday 8 February 2012
My Buddy Dave
This is my buddy Dave.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0565774/
Dave's an actor who's been on such milestone British shows as Emmerdale and Coronation Street. He lived in Canada for a while and then moved back to the U.K. He still finds time here and there to Skype with me which is awesome.
I met Dave over twenty years ago. I remember having sub-par fries with him outside on a cold February evening. I was freezing in a winter jacket - he was jovially comfortable in a jean jacket. I knew he was cool then and there.
Dave is a funny guy. I just mention his name to my Mom and she laughs. A picture is twice the laughs. If she sees him in person, death from a stroke could be imminent.
I haven't seen Dave since he went back to the U.K. around five years ago, but he's doing all right for himself. He's in a zombie movie this year - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2091455/.
I don't think it gets any cooler than that. Dave told me he has the first and last lines in the movie. I don't think most guys have the first and last lines in a relationship, let alone a zombie movie. But that Dave is just too cool for school. In a jean jacket. In New Brunswick. In February. All those years ago.
One day my Mom asked me what was new. I told her I put some stuff out into the compost bin, and that Dave was in a zombie movie in 2012. She immediately broke into hysterical laughter.
I don't know if it was because of Dave, or the compost bin.....
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0565774/
Dave's an actor who's been on such milestone British shows as Emmerdale and Coronation Street. He lived in Canada for a while and then moved back to the U.K. He still finds time here and there to Skype with me which is awesome.
I met Dave over twenty years ago. I remember having sub-par fries with him outside on a cold February evening. I was freezing in a winter jacket - he was jovially comfortable in a jean jacket. I knew he was cool then and there.
Dave is a funny guy. I just mention his name to my Mom and she laughs. A picture is twice the laughs. If she sees him in person, death from a stroke could be imminent.
I haven't seen Dave since he went back to the U.K. around five years ago, but he's doing all right for himself. He's in a zombie movie this year - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2091455/.
I don't think it gets any cooler than that. Dave told me he has the first and last lines in the movie. I don't think most guys have the first and last lines in a relationship, let alone a zombie movie. But that Dave is just too cool for school. In a jean jacket. In New Brunswick. In February. All those years ago.
One day my Mom asked me what was new. I told her I put some stuff out into the compost bin, and that Dave was in a zombie movie in 2012. She immediately broke into hysterical laughter.
I don't know if it was because of Dave, or the compost bin.....
Tuesday 7 February 2012
Two Movies On The Weekend
This past weekend I took in two flicks. I find the method of stacking movies every couple of weeks or so is more convenient than doing a weekly thing. That, and it's too damn wintry out to do it every week.
Underworld: Awakening was another installment drenched in blue filter. I must admit, I was a sucker for the first one, didn't mind the second, had to see the third, and went to the fourth 'cause I'm a damn completist.
Beckinsale can still fill out a catsuit, but she's looking a little more drawn than the first time she wore the black leather almost ten years ago. Storyline wasn't that intriguing, and the effects weren't that much better than previous efforts. The saving grace was the 3D viewing which made things more funky.
Chronicle was a cheap-looking, annoying little piece of video camera schlock which had me yawning 10 minutes in. The ad-libbed characters were so bad that you felt no empathy for them whether they lived or died. And empathy is a handy thing if you want your audience to get fully immersed in the movie.
As the young kids would say, Chronicle "sucked", "blew", or other modern variations thereof. Then again, the little weasels were probably texting like mad and trying to get to get to third base with whatever high school skank they brought.
Unfortunately for me, I had no such thing to color my enjoyment of the night.
Siggggghhhhhhhh.......
Underworld: Awakening was another installment drenched in blue filter. I must admit, I was a sucker for the first one, didn't mind the second, had to see the third, and went to the fourth 'cause I'm a damn completist.
Beckinsale can still fill out a catsuit, but she's looking a little more drawn than the first time she wore the black leather almost ten years ago. Storyline wasn't that intriguing, and the effects weren't that much better than previous efforts. The saving grace was the 3D viewing which made things more funky.
Chronicle was a cheap-looking, annoying little piece of video camera schlock which had me yawning 10 minutes in. The ad-libbed characters were so bad that you felt no empathy for them whether they lived or died. And empathy is a handy thing if you want your audience to get fully immersed in the movie.
As the young kids would say, Chronicle "sucked", "blew", or other modern variations thereof. Then again, the little weasels were probably texting like mad and trying to get to get to third base with whatever high school skank they brought.
Unfortunately for me, I had no such thing to color my enjoyment of the night.
Siggggghhhhhhhh.......
Monday 6 February 2012
Crashed Crustacean
Out to the Sobeys grocery store today for some stuff and got a big surprise going by the lobster tank - DEAD LOBSTER. IN THE MIDDLE OF THE TANK.
The poor dude(or dudette? I couldn't tell) was literally flat on his/her back, and that flipper was not flipping. The other lobsters were bunched up on either side of the square tank, leaving the dead one in full view in the center.
I paused in front of the tank, and then moved on, lest I start giggling uncontrollably. Or throw pieces of dill and celery into the tank. I thought wistfully for a moment of the perfect life and death lesson that could be utilized from this event. But I had no offspring to educate in front of the tank. And I'm assuming the fish person couldn't care less because even my long pause didn't elicit a response.
Had there been a showdown, a throwdown, it's gonna go....down....in the tank? UFC NIGHT gone horribly wrong? The jonah crab in the tank beside it looked like they knew who did it but weren't telling. The display fish in the frozen section nearby merely stared blankly ahead.
I pushed on(the cart) and slowly walked away.
That damn "Circle of Life" song from The Lion King is now stuck in my head. Thanks a lot dead lobster.
The poor dude(or dudette? I couldn't tell) was literally flat on his/her back, and that flipper was not flipping. The other lobsters were bunched up on either side of the square tank, leaving the dead one in full view in the center.
I paused in front of the tank, and then moved on, lest I start giggling uncontrollably. Or throw pieces of dill and celery into the tank. I thought wistfully for a moment of the perfect life and death lesson that could be utilized from this event. But I had no offspring to educate in front of the tank. And I'm assuming the fish person couldn't care less because even my long pause didn't elicit a response.
Had there been a showdown, a throwdown, it's gonna go....down....in the tank? UFC NIGHT gone horribly wrong? The jonah crab in the tank beside it looked like they knew who did it but weren't telling. The display fish in the frozen section nearby merely stared blankly ahead.
I pushed on(the cart) and slowly walked away.
That damn "Circle of Life" song from The Lion King is now stuck in my head. Thanks a lot dead lobster.
Friday 3 February 2012
Your Groundhog's Roadkill...........Probably..........
So Oromocto, New Brunswick got themselves a groundhog last year - had a naming contest and everything. Oromocto Ollie. Why not Gordon the Groundhog? Or Genesta? Or Graham Wafer?
But, the thing is, it was never truly their groundhog.
I mean, everybody else's groundhog is essentially a caged pet - their weather casting servant of sorts. They haul the hog out of its house and pretend to listen to it's weather forecast. Oromocto's vermin was wild and in an outdoor burrow of its own. It was reluctant to come out last year and this year the program is done.
Although, according to news reports, they say the groundhog is still in the burrow. And it's a female groundhog. No wonder there was the problem. Probably knows it's a female groundhog's right to change her mind.
The key is the caged groundhog that "lives" forever - like the old Phantom(Ghost Who Walks) character from the thirties. I mean, c'mon, the original Wiarton Willie Wodent is long gone. I'm assuming he was well taken care of and was dragged willingly from his provided burrow each February 2nd.
Either that, or some Laurence-Olivier-in-Marathon-Man-type came in and gave him the old "Is it safe?" routine.
Get with it, Oromocto, and realize that you gotta control your weather forecaster. Then you control the weather. Otherwise, you're roadkill on the lonely cold highways of New Brunswick.
But, the thing is, it was never truly their groundhog.
I mean, everybody else's groundhog is essentially a caged pet - their weather casting servant of sorts. They haul the hog out of its house and pretend to listen to it's weather forecast. Oromocto's vermin was wild and in an outdoor burrow of its own. It was reluctant to come out last year and this year the program is done.
Although, according to news reports, they say the groundhog is still in the burrow. And it's a female groundhog. No wonder there was the problem. Probably knows it's a female groundhog's right to change her mind.
The key is the caged groundhog that "lives" forever - like the old Phantom(Ghost Who Walks) character from the thirties. I mean, c'mon, the original Wiarton Willie Wodent is long gone. I'm assuming he was well taken care of and was dragged willingly from his provided burrow each February 2nd.
Either that, or some Laurence-Olivier-in-Marathon-Man-type came in and gave him the old "Is it safe?" routine.
Get with it, Oromocto, and realize that you gotta control your weather forecaster. Then you control the weather. Otherwise, you're roadkill on the lonely cold highways of New Brunswick.
Thursday 2 February 2012
The Restaurant on the Edge of Nowhere..........
So I'm driving along and I see this sign in a vacant lot just past a motel(or just before, depending on what direction you're travelling)
PUNJAB SPICES
INDIAN RESTAURANT
Really? It's an "Indian Restaurant"? Whoa. I'm surprised.
I see "Punjab Spices" and immediately think fried chicken and waffles, but I may be a minority.....
Anyway, a description under a title is always appreciated, and perhaps "fried chicken and waffles" wouldn't fit in such a small space.
So I follow the arrow and I just see more of a vacant lot. Maybe not so much ABOUT your restaurant on the sign but rather its LOCATION would be a good idea.
Keep the camera pan going and we're at the edge of the lot. Beyond it lies the ocean. Maybe Punjab Spices got washed away. Or maybe its in India and you gotta hit the ocean. It's only 7000 miles,. give or take a few.
I dunno, it's cold and windy and Rotten Ronnies has a two can dine thingy on right now.
PUNJAB SPICES
INDIAN RESTAURANT
Really? It's an "Indian Restaurant"? Whoa. I'm surprised.
I see "Punjab Spices" and immediately think fried chicken and waffles, but I may be a minority.....
Anyway, a description under a title is always appreciated, and perhaps "fried chicken and waffles" wouldn't fit in such a small space.
So I follow the arrow and I just see more of a vacant lot. Maybe not so much ABOUT your restaurant on the sign but rather its LOCATION would be a good idea.
Keep the camera pan going and we're at the edge of the lot. Beyond it lies the ocean. Maybe Punjab Spices got washed away. Or maybe its in India and you gotta hit the ocean. It's only 7000 miles,. give or take a few.
I dunno, it's cold and windy and Rotten Ronnies has a two can dine thingy on right now.
Wednesday 1 February 2012
And the award for most sensitive drug store goes to........
My local Pharmasave drug store is a veritable force of retail innovation.
Not content to sit around, they sent their crack marketing team to the back room in order to push out some surplus stuff....
Awesome.
I don't need any, but the crudely drawn, italicized "Blow-out" makes me want to buy some just for the awkward check out chat with the cashier. The incorrectly spelled "incontinence" is the icing on the cake - a nod to the non-spell check generation. Note the large size of the "I" and "n" until the writer realized they were gonna run out of room, thereby shrinking the script. And changing the spelling. Or is it "speeling" if I'm running out of room?
I thought of lingering around the store to see if I could spy some lucky customer falling prey to this exceptional merchandise offer. Maybe it would go something like this:
(elderly female senior, low whispery voice) "Ah, pardon me, young man, but, um, could you direct me to the, um, you know, adult....pads, you know...."
(store employee, slightly booming sales voice) "You mean, the INCONTINENCE pads? We've got a "BLOW-OUT" sale on them RIGHT NOW!!!"(points excitedly at the overhead sign)
As I was waiting for something like this to transpire, I lurked around the store and came across some more retail gold.....
I think I'll pass on the muffins. Maybe a cookie.....?
Nope, thanks.
I'm just gonna run out the door. It sounds like I'm dry heaving as I try to suppress the laughter......
Not content to sit around, they sent their crack marketing team to the back room in order to push out some surplus stuff....
Awesome.
I don't need any, but the crudely drawn, italicized "Blow-out" makes me want to buy some just for the awkward check out chat with the cashier. The incorrectly spelled "incontinence" is the icing on the cake - a nod to the non-spell check generation. Note the large size of the "I" and "n" until the writer realized they were gonna run out of room, thereby shrinking the script. And changing the spelling. Or is it "speeling" if I'm running out of room?
I thought of lingering around the store to see if I could spy some lucky customer falling prey to this exceptional merchandise offer. Maybe it would go something like this:
(elderly female senior, low whispery voice) "Ah, pardon me, young man, but, um, could you direct me to the, um, you know, adult....pads, you know...."
(store employee, slightly booming sales voice) "You mean, the INCONTINENCE pads? We've got a "BLOW-OUT" sale on them RIGHT NOW!!!"(points excitedly at the overhead sign)
As I was waiting for something like this to transpire, I lurked around the store and came across some more retail gold.....
I think I'll pass on the muffins. Maybe a cookie.....?
Nope, thanks.
I'm just gonna run out the door. It sounds like I'm dry heaving as I try to suppress the laughter......
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